Thankful Tuesday

So I decided to participate in Denise's Thankful Tuesday for the first time.
This week's assignment "Life Lessons" I am gonna shoot for 10 as assigned but I don't know if I will get there, here goes.

1. Amazing surprises and happy accidents - My son was an amazing surprise and the best kind of happy accident. My husband (who was my boyfriend at the time) and I were doing everything possible to not have a baby, so the positive pregnancy test was definitely a shocker. I only took a pregnancy test because I wanted to officially rule it out before I made a Dr appt. I remember thinking why isn't that line going away, and how come it popped up right away. I don't think I actually believed it until after my best friend and a blood test had confirmed it. Now I can't imagine my life with out my crazy monkey. I don't know what I did with myself before I became a mom. I know I had a lot of adventure before, but none of it seems to compare to the adventure of being his mom. I have learned more about myself than I think I learned in the 25 yrs before I was blessed with him.

2. Bad reactions to happy news - When I told my husband (again my boyfriend at the time) that I was pregnant he was not happy to say the least. We had talked about children and he had always said that he did not think he ever wanted to have children. His reaction was not a good one and we spoke very little for the next 3 months. But we worked things out. I know with out a doubt that my husband is with me because he loves me. I know we are together because we want to be, because we love each other and no other reason. Also going through that and coming out the other side, I can't think of anything that could come between us. That kind of security is amazing.

3. 2 month old w/103.3 temp, incompetent Dr & 5 day hospital stay - When my monkey was 2 months old he spiked a temperature of 103.3. I got him to the Dr, unfortunately his pediatrician was off and we had to see another Dr in the practice. She gave him some Tylenol, his temp went down to 101.8 and she sent us home. She instructed us to call if his temperature went back up. Sure enough about 2 hrs after getting home his temp was back up to 102.3. I called the on call and was sent to the pediatric urgent care. The amazing Dr on duty admitted us just knowing that my son had had such a temp earlier. That night his temp sky rocketed to 103.7 under his arm, and Tylenol wasn't working. Thankfully being in the hospital the nurse was able to catch the spike, and give him Motrin. We found out that he had urinary tract reflux, a condition that has had to be monitored ever since. But I learned not to question my instincts, to fight when I know something is wrong with my son, and that mommy really does know best. I also learned that I can simply say no way when my regular pediatrician is out and I am offered the incompetent Dr that sent us home.

4. Cancer, Heart Disease, and MS - I'll start with cancer. Cancer taught me the meaning of family, strength, purpose, and loss. When my grandfather was diagnosed with cancer, I was devastated. He was my hero, my everything, and the thought of him not being there had never occurred to my 9 yr old self. My family rallied around him helping my Grandma care for him. He was so strong, he continued on when I know there had to be days he wanted to give up. He was a farmer, that was his joy and purpose in his life. When we learned the cancer had spread and he didn't have much time left, he suddenly got better. He planted, tended and harvested his field, then he went to bed and didn't get up again. When he died I thought that I had to be strong, even though inside I was dieing. I had never lost anyone before. It was the toughest lesson I have ever learned. Heart disease, my grandmother suffered from heart disease for many years. As long as I can remember. I learned to eat healthier, to watch what I was eating and what to avoid. I learned to be vigilant about my heart and health. I learned to fight for my own health and the kindness of strangers. I also learned that it was ok to fall apart when she died and I didn't have to be strong for anyone. I learned how to lean on the people in my life. MS, my amazing mother in law was living with MS for many years before I even met her. In the short time I got to spend with her I learned that you can live with a chronic disease you don't have to suffer from it. I learned that getting up and going out to do what you have to is more mental than physical. If you tell your body you have to get up and go it will do as you command. She never called in to work, in fact when she had to have surgery and did not recover, she had 9 months of sick leave and 2 months of vacation built up. I learned to muscle through after all if she could get up and go to work day after day, a little cold shouldn't debilitate me for days.

5. Hospice - Hospice care is truly a God send for families dealing with a family member approaching the end of their life. The people who work for hospice are angels walking among us. They are there not only to care for your family member but the whole family.

6. The Ex - If he had not been who he was, I would not be who I am now. I thought that he would be the rest of my life. We tried to have a baby, and never could. We talked about getting married but never even got engaged. We planned to move in together but never quite got it together. He did not treat me well, I didn't see it at the time. I think we were toxic to each other. I became a person I did not know, recognize or like. But when it was over, and my heart had healed I realized exactly who I was. I knew what I wanted. I learned what I would not tolerate in a relationship, what I could live with out, and what I had to have. I learned to stand on my own two feet, and just be happy to be me. I appreciate my husband so much because I experienced what I did. Our wedding song says it all "God blessed the broken road that led me straight to you"

7. The people who have left - I believe that people are in your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime (I got that from an email or Chicken Soup for the Soul). I know that every person that has entered and left my life was there for either a reason or a season. Feeling the heart break that comes with losing a friend has made me appreciate even more the lifetimers in my life. I know that they will be there no matter what, they have proven that. I know that it doesn't matter if I talk to then everyday, once a month, or once a year when we do it is like no time has passed. That is the best kind of friendship.

8. Divorce - Odd as it seems, I am actually grateful that my parents divorced. They taught me the true meaning of respect, consideration, and doing what is best for your child. I never knew how they felt about each other, it wasn't relevant to my life. They never talked bad about each other to or in front of me. They could be together at school functions or what ever I needed them to be there for. If they hadn't divorced I might not have my sister. I wouldn't know my step-mom and her amazing family. I wouldn't know my mom's spousal equivalent and his wonderful family. My life would be less full without these people in my life.

9. Getting fired - I was recently fired from a job I was pretty miserable at. When it happened I was upset. I enjoyed being among adults after being a full time stay at home mom for 3 1/2 yrs. The hours were perfect, I worked while my son was at preschool. Then after losing the job, my mom's spousal equivalent, offered me a job as his assistant. It is even more perfect than I could have dreamed. I work from home 2 days a week, go to the office 3 days, the hours and pay are great, and I have a wonderful and flexible boss.

10. Failing to be June Cleaver - When I made the decision to stay home with my son, I thought that my house would always be clean, the laundry would always be done, I would cook gourmet meals, and teach my son everything under the son. All of this while looking beautiful, and being completely stress free. Well I quickly learned that beauty would be traded for an extra few minutes of sleep, or time with my husband. The clean house and laundry would be replaced by playing with my son, watching him sleep, or being amazed at his development. Gourmet meals would be exchanged for what ever I could cook in 30 min (thank you Rachael Ray). I think the only goal I had set for myself was to teach my son. I try to find lessons in all that we do. What has mommy learned? I have learned that being a stay at home mom is the hardest most demanding and amazingly rewarding job I will never get paid for. I have learned that if my son is clean, clothed, fed and happy at the end of the day I succeeded. The house will get clean, the laundry will get done, but I will never get back any of the moments with my son I traded to do get them done. Perfection is relative and as long as my son is happy, the rest doesn't even compare.